The aroma of coffee
stains my tongue, yet
I can still taste
my first kiss, how
my lips trembled until
they met hers and we
hung there in that
soft moment
behind the darkness
of our eyelids
- Ryan Martinez
I found myself writing again, the same old tired lines about a tired heart with the will to go on.
I found myself humming again, that same old worn out love song
I found myself laughing again, about the stupid things we say
I found you inside my head again, like every other day
Have you ever felt your heart vibrate?
Not flutter.
Not jump.
Not sink or fall.
But vibrate as though it was being jolted
By tiny electric bolts
All trying to find a connection
But just fizzling out at the source
It feels like love on fire
Burning fast and free
Pure unadulterated electricity
Just as quick as it starts it stops
Fizzling ever so
Into nothing, just silence
Waiting for the current to find it again
Never knowing when it will start
Or when it will end
Just a tiny vibration
In the depths of your chest
Reminding you the organ is alive
That your ability to love will not rest
So let your body hum
Work with the subtle vibes
Ride out hte high of the vibration
Because you’ll never know how long
It can last until…
It fizzles, and sizzles
Last
Have you ever felt your heart vibrate?
A sensation not meant to last.
It’s a new day, everyday.
And I don’t just mean
by the way the sun rises and sets
But by the way I wake up
The way I open my eyes
To greet the day
(Or sometimes hide away)
By the way my mind clears
Or clouds
And how my insecurities mount
Or by how surmountable they feel
In the moment I open my eyes
And decide if I live it or hide away
It’s always a brand new day
A bundle of imperfections
Stitched together with the best of intentions
Still add up to make one beautiful you
So while you sit and wait
On the shore
Waiting for the sea to turn
Or the ship to come and bring you home
Remember that you are the reason
For all of the love poems
You are the reason for the admiration my heart knows
You are the reason for every single waking hour
I spend living
Searching for a purpose
On this otherwise miserable earth
You are the reason for the breaths of sunshine
That make life a little brighter
And I’d be so much less
If it weren’t for your imperfections
Because they help me realize mine
And I love you for every single thing
You find wrong with the world inside yourself
You are your good intentions
Regardless of your self satisfaction
You are close to everything
That makes my dreams come true
Your good (and bad) miscalculations, too
You fantastically, wonderfully you
The 11:11 wish come true
Scared.
Of what’s next.
Excited
For what’s to come.
Scared.
Of feelings once lost, being found.
Excited
For whatever they may lead.
Scared.
Of no longer being safe.
Excited
To take the next big leap
All are one and one are all
Just gotta be ready
To either fly or fall
Because there’s no use to living
If you don’t at least try to be alive.
Here I Go Down Circle Road
by Shel Silverstein
here I go down circle road strong and hopeful hearted through the dust and wind up just exactly where I started.
